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Your vibrator is getting action , as is his favorite porn site — but your actual bed?

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That's pretty much exclusively for getting Z's and folding laundry these days. You're more likely to watch The Bachelor with him than actually go out to see a movie. It's so much easier to stay in and watch that and your Netflix recommended watch list with your favorite takeout. Total bonding time!

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But any activities requiring effort and, er, shaving your legs? You're like: Meh. You can't remember the last time you gave one another a romantic gift. Birthdays and anniversaries are reserved for jokes — you're a pro at laughing off his dirty humor cards — or necessities, like the new speakers you need for the living room. But massages, flowers, and jewelry? Those are a thing of the past. Your whining threshold has lowered significantly.

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Remember when you were dating and you'd bat your eyelashes and say "no biggie" when he spilled a beer on your designer flats? OK, we're not saying you should go back to that kind of fake laid-back-ness. But complaining about how much you hate his one pair of dad jeans, or having dinner with your in-laws again — save that stuff for girls' night venting.

You do the ugly stuff in front of each other. Flossing, clipping your toenails, digging for gold, you name it. Those "I'm too pretty to poop" pretenses are long gone. You snap at each other over stupid things, like whose turn it is to walk the dog or pick up the dry cleaning. This kind of taking-each-other-for-granted bickering is a sure sign that you feel comfortable enough with your husband-buddy to be kind of a jerk to one another.

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Stop wasting your time with sites that beat around the bush If you've been looking to hookup anonymously with college girls, MILFs, cougars, soccer moms, Latinas, Asian girls, black girls, and even bored housewives in your area, our program has all your needs covered. You can hook up with all sorts of sexy young women and college students in no time. You got that right-we'll help you dispense with the typical bullshit teasing you normally get with other dating sites. What's our secret?

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In fact, the only time you should text or call them is to set up your next time and place to bang. The biggest difference between dating and being fuck buddies is that there is nothing more than sex in the latter. This can be hard for some people to get used to, the fact that there is virtually no emotions in this setup. As I mentioned before, as fuck buddies, you basically owe each other nothing, besides some general respect. For these reasons, if you get jealous when you find out that your fuck buddy hooked up with someone else, that is totally not chill and will cause them to run for the hills.

If Brad goes up to Sarah or sends her a passive aggressive or just plain aggressive text, Brad has no chill. You can basically guarantee that Sarah will never sleep with Brad again.